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By Mikal Schomburg
 When I was younger I was into many forms of escapism. I abused drugs, alcohol, and myself; though that didn't slow me down from doing what I wanted to do. I'd still put in a 12 hour day at work, and come home and take care of my wife and kids. But it was empty and pointless, and I found that I had a lot of frustration.
After the failure of my first relationship I met my future wife who was a very strong Buddhist.
When she married me I was recently separated, going through a bankruptcy, had two kids, was going to school whilst working two part time jobs, trying to make ends meet.
Soon after getting married, we attended a Bible study at a church. It was stiff and formal, and I felt I had to be careful what I asked. When I asked honest, direct questions the response seemed to be, 'Jesus loves you' that's why. I had been strongly anti-Christian for many years anyway, this answer only reinforced my these views.
Two years into our marriage I was busy working, with my wife at home alone. When she let me know how lonely she was feeling by herself I told her she had to find something to do, to go out and meet some people, that I couldn't be everything to her. So she did. She went out and found an Alpha course. She went, but I decided I wasn't going to go. It didn't have anything to do with me.
My wife came to faith in Christ at that first Alpha course. When she came home from the Holy Spirit weekend, there was something distinctively different about her. She told me about some of the things that happened. She had three more weeks to go in the course. I asked her if could go?
Once I saw the changes that were happening in her, I knew I had an important choice to make I could either follow with her, or if I didn't I would lose her. Not that we would get divorced, but I knew we would not be sharing a common life path together. I knew that if I chose not to learn about Christianity this would be a major area of our lives that we wouldn't be able to share, and it would drive a wedge between us.
So I went, and finished off the last three weeks with her, and immediately I was asked to lead the follow up course not take it, but lead it! I wasn't even converted at that point. I don't listen that well, but when I have to explain something to somebody else that's when I really start understanding things. So I said I would do it.
When the next Alpha session started up in the spring, I decided it was time to go and check it out. I enjoyed the discussion on Alpha. I've always been a talker. I love to debate. Any subject that comes up I'll argue either side of it, just so I can argue.
Over the course of the eleven weeks a certain trust builds up within the group. It becomes a really nice dynamic. And I found too that part of establishing that comfort level is the meal. By the time we're ready for discussion time everything is loose and relaxed. Everybody knows each others' names, knows a little bit about each other. And it's not intimidating in any way whatsoever.
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I had my own encounter with God when I went away on the Holy Spirit weekend. I was totally overcome with emotion. I actually couldn't function. I had to leave the room and actually sat in my own room for about half an hour, feeling incredibly loved, but not deserving of it. I hadn't done anything [to deserve it]. In fact, I had done all the wrong things.
So I had a very powerful, moving experience. And that was the start of my Christianity. That's when I started to believe, and that's when I actually started to change who I was.
I came to the realization that the reason I felt there was something wrong with the world was because in fact there is something wrong with the world; it wasn't just my imagination. I learned afterwards that that feeling is actually God calling me. That's God saying, You know what there's something you need to look for. There's something missing.
In many ways I am very similar to the way I used to be. It's kind of like when you put on a pair of sunglasses. Everything is exactly the same, and yet everything is completely different. I've found my main characteristics are very similar. I've always been a compassionate and empathetic kind of person, and also an organizing, leading, guiding sort of person. Now I have a valid outlet for them - in the church.
Previously I would channel those talents or tendencies into more of a political action kind of thing. I was socially conscious, but it was more Let's have a demonstration over there or let's unionize this workplace here. But I found that all these activities were hollow. It's all just surface stuff.
I've found with my outlet here at the church I can touch people where it really matters. To me that makes a big difference. One of my chief frustrations before with work was if I didn't agree with the philosophy of the company I worked for, I couldn't work there. I've found with this place (the church) I can throw everything into it wholeheartedly. I probably spend about 60 hours a week here and get paid for 40, but I love it and if something needs to be done I do it. I'm really busy and involved. I wouldn't have that kind of commitment with another workplace.
I found it interesting that in our marriage vows, we actually swore in front of God to be together, and I think it was the first time I had ever made a promise to God. That was my first time ever saying anything in front of God. And that felt important enough to say in front of God even though I didn't know what God was.
Our faith has made a difference in our marriage. The option of divorce disappeared when we became Christians. It forces us to deal with our problems rather than thinking there is a back door. Our communication as Christians is quite different. Because we have common beliefs and values, we have a higher authority to appeal to when we disagree. We realize that our own opinions and preferences are not the final issue.
I am now working full time at Oakridge Presbyterian in London, ON. as the IT guy. And not only that in three and a half years I went from being a non-believing guy off the street to actually administering the Alpha course here. It's where I belong. It's what I need to be doing.
November 1/2007
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