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By Adam Duguay
Most people would say I was a pretty good person. A big party-er and arrogant, but not a terrible person. I had lots of friends. I was pretty much what you'd expect of most college-aged guys. I enjoyed a good time. I was typical of that age group.
I wasn't following God, but God was in control of my life and had my best interests at heart. I can see that now in retrospect. It started with not getting what I wanted. I had wanted to go to college in Oakville, Ontario but ended up in London. That started a string of events that led me eventually to faith in Christ and a wonderful job as a graphic artist with Compassion Canada.
At college I connected with a childhood friend of mine. Matt had gone through a rough patch in his life. His engagement had fallen apart. He needed a place to stay. So we moved in together.
Matt had re-kindled the faith he had abandoned in high school, and started going to Glad Tidings Assembly. There he heard about Alpha. He was told if he was going to come he needed to bring a friend, so he invited a co-worker, who bailed out the night of Alpha. Matt invited me for a free dinner. Being just out of college and a bachelor not wanting to cook for myself, I said that sounded like a pretty good idea.
On the first night I didn't even have the right name tag. I was named Brendan, not Adam Duguay! My being there seemed an accident. It certainly wasn't Matt's intention to evangelize me. It was his intention to not embarrass himself by not bringing anybody.
At the time I had explored a number of religions, and felt like I was a very spiritual person by nature. I believed that the spiritual component of life was very important and was something worth investigating. So I read up on Islam, Buddhism, Daoist Philosophy, Christianity and Judaism. Christianity was the one that made the most sense to me. I had already come to the conclusion that there was a God, and even that Jesus was the Son of God. But I didn't have any idea what the implications of that were.
I enjoyed the first night and definitely wanted to go back again. I enjoyed talking and discussing. I'm an introspective person, so I like to hear what other people think about too, especially when it comes to topics like God and the church. I found the whole thing fascinating. All of the messages made sense.
When we were just a few weeks in, just before the retreat weekend, Nicky [the speaker] was talking about how God speaks to you. At the end of it he said a very profound thing. He looked at the camera and said, Do you think God might be trying to talk to you right now?
At that moment it was just like everything else in the room went away, and it was just him talking to me. At that second I thought, You know, God might be trying to get my attention right now. Maybe I'll take a chance on this. And if God's really real, I'll make him prove it.
It was the first time I prayed any kind of prayer. It wasn't the prayer that Nicky prayed. My prayer was more along the lines of God, if you're real, then I want to believe. But I don't want to believe something that isn't real. So you're going to have to prove to me that you are real. If you can prove that, then I will follow you.
That was the end of it for that night. I walked away feeling like this might be something that would turn into something really good.
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It was at the Holy Spirit weekend that I had my first encounter with the Spirit of God a tremendous sense of peace and love and joy. I really had an encounter with God and I just knew he was real!
I was standing there during the worship portion, when they were singing, and I got this little prompting, this push in my heart or in my mind. It said, Just try to put your hands up. So I kind of put my hands in the air and nothing happened. I said, This isn't creepy or weird. OK, this is fine. So I was good there. I was still at the back of the room, my hands were in the air, the music was playing.
Then I felt this same kind of little push saying, Maybe you need to go to the front. Just go to the front and see what happens. The hand thing was fine, so going to the front was probably going to be OK too. So I went to the front. The friend who had invited me was already there. He was kneeling down, so I knelt down next to him. We were just listening to the music and I started to bawl.
I'm not an emotional guy. I'm not accustomed to crying even at funerals. But I just broke down, and I can't explain why it started. I sobbed uncontrollably for 15 20 minutes.
When I was done, I had this incredible sense of peace. I went out to the lobby area, lay down on a couch, and looked up at the ceiling. Everything was right with the universe for the first time. It was like I could stay on this couch having this feeling forever.
I knew that God had shown up and that he was real. Somehow this big, powerful, important Person was interested in me. I would never be able to go back from this! I started to get more involved with the church, attending weekend services. I really liked the people there. I got involved with young adults.
I came back to Alpha and table helped, then led three or four tables. I invited friends and they came to know the Lord. They're serving the church now, they're doing missions, they're working in kids' ministry.
I started re-connecting with my friends from college. They were asking about my faith because it was such a departure from the Adam they knew. So I had to share my experience with them. That raised their curiosity, so when I invited them to hear more and to come to Alpha, they came.
They didn't all become Christians at Alpha. I resolved to be the best friend to them, regardless, and maintain our relationship, because that's what I believe God would want me to do. We'd talk about our lives and I'd give advice Where are you getting that from? From the Bible Really? Yeah. They need more time. They need to see more of the difference, more of the benefit of the wisdom that comes from knowing God.
I love it because it's a daily challenge there's always a new place to go, there's always something new to do. There's always something new to discover, to learn. It's a life-long process.
I went from the guy who was drinking five nights a week, and doing drugs, and basically chasing anything that moved, to the guy who's going to church now. I'm a Christian! And this is all over a four year time span. That's four years. What will God do with forty?!
November 22/2007
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